Your ex asking to be friends is like... a kidnapper asking "to keep in touch" after letting you go!
Most advice given says that deciding to be friends with your ex is not the best decision in the world. Common thought and advice is that it is better to cut all ties and move on ! I believe we all agree that this is the best advice in cases where the relationship is toxic or the split was chaotic or traumatic. If however, the split is amicable and both parties agree that it is time for a new chapter, should deciding whether to and how to stay friends with an ex–romantic partner still be complex and challenging?
This is the situation I have found myself in recently. So off the bat - I do not have the answer ! I am taking the situation day by day but I thought to share my experience with you. My health condition means that my chances of having children naturally is low. He wanted children so the decision was to end our romantic relationship with the option of being friends. When we were first considering the idea of being friends, I felt like it would be the most difficult thing in the world. It has been awhile since we made the decision, and I am not traumatised and ready for a dramatic showdown...
I think it is because I made the decision to let go of the past stories and the future stories. The memories and the fantasies. I accepted our situation for what it was; the reality of the situation. The reality was that we were not meant to be , forever was not written in our history, he was not the one for eternity, another is out there for me and our lives will ultimately be better for this decision. I did not wish for an alternative reality, I accepted the current reality. Nothing was missing. Nothing was lost. This perspective has helped me move to a neutral space that feels like freedom. Freedom to explore the idea of friendship. Freedom to start again and see what the future holds...
That's it for today my lovelies. This is still work in progress... I may share an update on this some time in the future. In the meantime, I hope that this will continue to be a positive journey even though there may be some complexities and challenges along the way.