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What is Love?

Updated: May 5, 2020

You Lost. Honestly ...

You Lost. Honestly ... was one of the last messages the one I love sent me at what turned out to be the end of our relationship.

I was extremely baffled because I have never thought of love as a win or lose situation. It got me wondering about my perspective on love ... What is love?

I believe that love is seeing the beauty in everyone through every situation. To love another is to see them. To chose another, to honour another and to cherish another. Letting their inner beauty wash over the flaws and imperfections. Appreciating the depths of happiness and joy. Striving with them. Supporting them or when you can, walking beside them in their endeavours. Being the mirror to their souls. Admiring their zest for life and sharing in it with them.

On the flip side, I do not expect love to always mean permanence. Sometimes, the spirit of love comes to you for a reason or a season. No matter how long you would wish to keep this love, destiny calls; your future self is calling you. Sometimes, no matter what you try, your different life experiences and perspectives demand a separation. It can be a separation for a while or a lifetime.

Anyway, when he said you have lost ...I had to start figuring out what he meant. I did not only fail to figure it out; but I failed miserably. I had not lost! I had sooo much to be thankful for. He gave me back a part of my life that I had forgotten. My life journey would have taken so much longer if I had not met him.

I start with the fact that he chose me and showed me how to choose myself. He cherished my spirit and told me who I was often. He made it easier for me to teach myself that I could be enough. He also showed me how much I loved myself - I know it is true because I fought for me, not only us. I think we broke up because I was fighting for me. The feeling of self-love and the freedom it gives me to know that I can be there for myself and still love him; is the most liberating feeling in the world. He was the balance that I kept promising to find but never made the time for.

He was another part of me that I got to explore and love immensely. He was also a part of me that needed healing. How can I have lost when love and I learnt more about each other? How can I have lost when I have learnt how to love better? How can I have lost when I discovered the parts of me that needed my love? Love is a beautiful feeling. Love is a force. Love is more than the individual. Love is the positive desire that we all have to deeply appreciate another. That desire to appreciate another will remain in me forever. There is always someone to deeply appreciate. There is always someone who will deeply appreciate me.This desire to appreciate another can be felt in different forms and will never leave me. Unconditional love, romantic love, affectionate love, self-love, enduring love... Love will always be with me, in me, for me. I am love. As one love fades, there is still more love to give and receive...

My Love Mantra:

The Cycle of Love

Everything I love

I will lose in the end

But love will always return

Albeit, in different forms

Love will always be an unknown destiny

It is only a matter of time

So as one type of love fades

I wait in faith for a new love to give love to

There are no winners or losers

There is only more love in every second ..

In Love - Always


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